The fearless Peer Mentor

After being one of the first young people to receive mentoring support from Listening Peers, Amber Norris is now one of the programme’s key Mentors and known for taking on the most difficult of tasks totally undeterred. We sat down with her and Listening Peers Coordinator Neil Maclean to hear about her journey.

We meet in the relaxed setting of Bridges Project’s new Volunteer Hub, where Amber starts by talking us through all the decorations the charity’s young volunteers have put up to personalise the space. The way the 17-year-old speaks in such a confident, witty and articulate manner almost makes it difficult to imagine that she was the person she is about to tell she was three years ago.

Amber was referred to Listening Peers as a 14-year-old in 2022, when the peer mentoring programme partly funded by the Corra Foundation administered Partnership Drugs Initiative was still in its infancy. She was a student at Musselburgh Grammar School but was disengaged after being bullied and was living in a difficult environment at home.

“I didn’t have an escape. Being home was bad. School was bad,” Amber recalls.

She had received various support from different services but did not feel this helped or suited her.

“I was nervous when meeting new people and didn’t want to admit that I was needing help. I had spoken to so many people about my problems that I couldn’t be bothered going through it all again,” says the Musselburgh teenager.

Amber admits that her mental health was at an all-time low.

“I was in a very low place. I don’t think anyone really knew before it was too late.”

Amber was matched up with Ren, one of Listening Peers’ Mentors at the time. At first, she was also sceptical to peer mentoring support.

“When I first met Ren, I didn’t know how to feel,” she says.

This doubt was reflected in her engagement in the early days of the mentoring support she received. At some point, she was close to disengaging from the support altogether.

“I almost considered closing her case,” Neil states.

“I’m glad you didn’t,” Amber adds and smiles.

Things soon started to turn and Amber began to trust Ren. As a result, both her engagement with the support and her relationship with her Mentor improved dramatically.

“I felt that Ren just got me. She completely understood me, more than anyone had done in the past.”

Amber explains that she felt like the people she had received support from through other services were not interested in her.

“I felt like a burden. But Ren understood and actually listened. She also talked about her own experiences, which made me trust her more. She became like a friend, like a big sister,” she says.

“At one point, I remember you said Ren saved you,” Neil adds.  

Amber nods in agreement:

“If I didn’t have Bridges Project, I genuinely don’t think I would have been here.”

This powerful statement hammers home just how life-changing, and even life-saving, mentoring support was for Amber.

A mentoring baptism of fire

It was soon time for Amber to change someone’s life herself. Neil saw that the teenager had the potential to use her lived experience and experience of receiving support to become a good Mentor and therefore offered her the opportunity to receive mentoring training. Amber decided to give it a go and in 2023, as a 15-year-old, she became Listening Peers’ youngest ever Mentor at the time.  

As if it was not enough to be the freshest and youngest Mentor, Amber got a real baptism of fire with the first mentee she was allocated.

“Her first mentee had some very complex barriers. It would have been a challenging case for anybody,” Neil says.

Amber also remembers this young person’s challenges vividly and talks about how he displayed quite a lot of anti-social behaviour. However, the new Mentor was determined not to give up on her mentee.

 “I just thought about what Ren did to me and he did open up a lot, just like I did to Ren, because he realised I had similar lived experience to him,” Amber says.

She also started setting boundaries for her mentee, something adults in his life had never done before. This became a turning point for him.

“The change was remarkable, to be honest. He became more respectful, polite and warmed to certain members of staff,” Neil says.

“His did not want to engage with school but he will definitely always remember this mentoring relationship with Amber.”

Amber has since mentored several other young people who have had a challenging start in life. Another memorable match was with a mentee who was planning on leaving school but after just two meetings with Amber, she improved both her school attendance and attitude towards school and decided to stay. Amber also created an action plan with this mentee.

The Child Planning Meeting expert

One of Amber’s trademarks has become attending Child Planning Meetings (CPMs), where she advocates for her mentees. The 17-year-old has attended more CPMs than any of her fellow Mentors.

“Amber is a powerful advocate for young people in CPMs,” Neil says.

“There was one particular CPM where it was clear that Amber knew more about her mentee than anyone else and the adults in the room were just scribbling away to take notes of what she was saying!”

Amber does not shy away from standing up to authority figures at CPMs, which is another example of how far she has come herself.

“I used to hate speaking even in front of just two people, like we are now,” she says, referring to the setting we are in.

“But in CPMs, you just need to be confident and get your words across. If not, you won’t be heard.”

Amber’s experience of attending CPMs, many of which have involved complex issues, has earned her a reputation as a bit of a CPM expert within Bridges Project. Recently, one staff member who had not been to a CPM before even asked her to come along to a CPM with them to support them.

Neil cannot praise Amber enough:

“It’s so rewarding to see the person she has become and the Mentor she is. I know I can call on her to go to any meeting with any young person and know it will be a success. She has a really rounded and impressive approach to her mentoring.”

“There are some Mentors Listening Peers wouldn’t be what it is without and Amber is one of them.”

Future paramedic or youth worker?

“I’m proud of myself and glad I didn’t give up,” Amber says when reflecting on her journey with Bridges Project.

“Now I just enjoy giving back what I received myself and enjoy helping people.”

The opportunity to help people is also what drives her career goals for the future. Amber has always wanted to be a paramedic and is signed up for a week of work experience with the NHS in June, called NHS Steps into Allied Health Professions, which will give her a better understanding of the field. However, she admits her mentoring experience has made her second-guess her future plans.

“Something is nudging me to go into youth work too.”

“We’ll see, I have loads of time.”